Intoxicated by the Music

Music. It is so captivating. I have so much respect for real recording artist cause they are able to escape the real and release their stresses and emotions through a medium that all people take part in. They get to share a part of them that most people don't get to share. I love music, I love listening to it. I grew up with music all the time. I played clarinet and I sang in the school choir. Music is so expressive and it can touch so many people in their every situation. I have been listening to music all day long ( which is really good cause I have not watched TV all day and it is Saturday). I have found a few songs today that have been able to really kind of explain how I am feeling and what is going on with me and this whole relationship thing. Let me just say that this break up ish is hard and is for the birds. Beyonce's new CD "I am Sasha Fierce" is phenomenal. Like I had only been listening to the second CD with all the fast songs on it but today I looked up the lyrics to the songs on the first CD and I noticed that a lot of them related to me or how I am feeling or how I want to feel. It really is a great CD and I feel stupid for neglecting it for so long. I have been listening to it mostly ( for like the past 3 hours) while I clean up and do my hair. All of the songs on the CD really hit home for me in some way and they are just so beautiful by themselves. Beyonce is such a truly talented singer in my opinion. Most songs that I like or that I have in my top songs I like them cause I can relate to them in some way or I connect with the message of the song. Like yesterday, I had to make a reference to the Plain White Tee's " Hate is a Strong Word" song ( I love them by the way) cause that was how I was feeling at the time. One thing that I can say for me and my ex is our love for music. It is like a release for us (well at least for me). Listening to a good song can bring out so many emotions, you could cry or dance around your apartment half naked like in Risky Business., it can uplift a situation and change moods. I know like when I am at a wack party and the DJ really sucks like it will just take one of my favorite party songs to come on for me to get in the mood and ready to party.
But anyways, the first song that touched me and how I feel or how I want to feel is Beyonce's " Disappear" The song say: "If I begged and if I cried, would it change the sky tonight? Would it give me some light? Should I wait for you to call? Is there any hope at all? Are you drifting by? When I think about it I know that I was never there or even cared. The more I think about it the less that I was able to share with you. I try to reach you I can almost feel you. You're nearly here and then you disappear. And when I lie all by myself I see your face an I hear your voice. My heart stays faithful and time has come an time has passed. If it's good it's got to last, it felt so right."
The next song from the CD would have to be "Broken-hearted Girl", (right how typical of me). " If everything about you never were, the nothing about you could have been. But still you live inside of me, so tell me how is that. You're the only one I wish I could forget, the only one I love to not forgive, and though you break my heart, you're the only one and though there are times I hate you cause I can't erase the times that you hurt me an put tears on my face. And even now when I hate you it pains me to say i know I'll be there at the end of the day. There's something that I feel I need to say. Up til now I've always been afraid that you would never come around and still i wanna put this out, you say you got the most respect for me, but sometimes I feel you're not deserving of me. And still you're in my heart. But you're the only one and yes there are times when I hate you but I don't complain, cause I've been afraid that you would walk away. But now I don't hate you I am happy to say that I will be there at the end of the day I don't wanna be without you babe. I don't want a broken heart, don't wanna take a breath without you babe, I don't wanna play that part. I know that I love you but let me just say I don't want to love you in no kind of way.... I don't want to play the broken-hearted girl"
I think that everyone who has every dealt with love issues should go listen to both of them.
Danity Kane also had a good song on their last album called "Poetry" talking about how the girl had been being neglected by the man and how she didn't know what to think he was driving her insane with all the mixed messages either you love or me or you don't.
I felt that writing about the songs would give me something to do and would keep me busy. It also kind of gives me a way to express myself through other people's words which is good. Sometimes we don't know how to say it and sometimes it takes for someone else to say it for us to really get a good understanding of it.